Prayer Is About Mending the Heart
Why does it appear that one person’s prayer is answered, and another’s ignored?
Let’s look at two examples.
In the first, Moses pleads with God to be allowed to see the Promised Land. He says, “Let me, I pray, cross over and see the good land on the other side of the Jordan.” (Deuteronomy 3) God does not relent. Moses never touches the land.
Why does God not answer Moses’ prayer? We recall that not entering the land is punishment for when Moses lost his temper with the people. (Numbers 20) The people were complaining about the lack of water (again!) and Moses hits the rock. And yet, our hero’s plea is understandable. Notice, he does not question the punishment and ask to go into the land. He only wishes to see it up close with his own eyes. God ignores his prayer.
In the second example, Hannah prays for a child. We read, “In the bitterness of her soul, she prayed to the Lord, crying intently.” (I Samuel 1) God responds to her plea and she gives birth to a son who later becomes the prophet Samuel. Hannah’s prayer is answered. In fact, her words serve as rabbinic literature’s model for prayer and this passage is the Haftarah portion we read on Rosh Hashanah morning when we hope God will likewise answer our prayers.
Hannah’s words are effective. Moses’ are not. Why does God answer Hannah’s request and not that of Moses? Who could be more deserving than Moses? He does everything God asks of him even though he did not want the job. He leads the people for forty years through the wilderness. Sure, he loses his patience every once in a while, but the people complain a lot and he is probably hot and thirsty too.
Why of all people is Moses’ plea denied? We do not know. The question continues to baffle us.
Why does God answer Hannah’s prayer but not that of Moses? Why is one person’s prayer answered and another’s ignored? Part of what we learn is that it is not about the person, but the feelings expressed in the prayer. It does not matter who the person is or what successes they may have achieved. It does not have to do character. It has nothing to do with merit. It only has to do with sentiments and feelings.
And that observation makes me uncomfortable. I have been a rabbi (and a person) long enough to know that there are plenty of people who pray with all their heart and yet their prayers remain unanswered. Telling these people that they are in good company and that God likewise ignores Moses’ plea is unhelpful and even unfeeling.
Still, I continue to pray with all my heart. I pray for instance every time we gather as a congregation, and several times in each service, that peace will soon be realized in every land, that hatred and bloodshed will cease even though the news and my head tell me otherwise.
I keep praying.
And I keep relying on the truth, found in our prayerbook. “Prayer invites God’s presence to suffuse our spirits, God’s will to prevail in our lives. Prayer may not bring water to parched fields, nor mend a broken bridge, nor rebuild a ruined city. But prayer can water an arid soul, mend a broken heart, rebuild a weakened will.”
Perhaps prayer is not about seeking answers but about striving for healing.
It is about mending.